Best Life?? How About Survival.

OK Folx, the shizzle's about to get real.

You’ve seen my business do many twists and turns over the years. As I’ve mentioned before, I’ve been a certified life coach, (still am, but I now only do one-on-ones on occasion or through my tarot consulting) jewelry maker, writer, (always) podcaster, (was and now will soon be again) and now tarot reader. Whew.

As a life coach, I think I can speak for all of us practitioners that our goal in that realm has always been to help people to “live their best lives”, to quote a very popular daytime show host. Even though I’m down with that sentiment, and however I’ve worked with people–actual coaching, interpreting cards, writing, podcasting, and even creating talisman jewelry–definitely has reflected that, I’ve realized lately that I’m not playing that game anymore.

Of course I want you all to be as happy as you can be, rocking out your lives and making each day count. That will never change.

But the reality is, the way the world is today, most of us will never be living our best lives. We just want to fucking survive.

The world as a collective of people is a pretty shitty place. People are dying of a virus that apparently an alarming amount of people think isn’t a big deal, is a hoax, or at worse, a conspiracy theory including the ridiculous idea that somehow they are implanting tracking devices in us with the vaccine…? What the actual F??

Many people won’t do the simple act of wearing a mask because it is uncomfortable, an inconvenience, or at worse, it is something someone has told them to do. Is this where I ask them why they are following any safety rule at all? Stopping at red lights? Wearing their seat belts? Wearing their shirt and shoes in a restaurant? (that’s for my safety, cuz I don’t want to see their half-naked asses, thank you.)

This is a world where people say they care about unborn children, but not the grown adults of a different color, race or belief system than they have. Or the mother of that child, once she has the baby and then needs help to feed it. Where they don’t care if any grown adult (or child, apparently) gets shot because there aren’t enough restrictions and rules around acquiring and owning a gun. Or their mental health that may keep people from shooting others in the first place.

This is a world where the mere color of your skin can hinder you from living your best life, in the best case scenario, or get you killed in a routine traffic stop, worst case scenario.

This is a world that cares more about hanging on tightly to their own than sharing with others.

And here’s the kicker…IT HAS ALWAYS BEEN THAT WAY. It’s just that now, many of us that have lived in a fantasy world most of our lives, have had the veil lifted–and personally, I don’t like what I see.

So what do we do?? How do those of us who feel too much, care too much, and truly want to live our best lives live?? We survive.

That’s what I’m here for, that’s what I do. And why I do what I do.

I don’t one-on-one coach much these days because I’m tired of the ‘everything will be great if you just think positively’ idea that tends to go along with that. More power if that works for you, but that’s not who this Virgo/Leo mix of pragmatic + woo person is.

I coach through the tarot. The tarot is a wonderful bridge between reality and fantasy that helps give your mind a much needed break from that reality, and comes at your stickiness from a place of magic that is just outside our human (and sucky) realm. I look at it as a self-development tool; the cards bring discovery and questions, YOU bring the answers and the magic.

I coach through my writing. Sure, I’m here to cheer you on–but I will also tell you that life just sucks sometimes, because it does. There is no sugar-coating that. We need to sit in it, let it suck, and ride it out to the other side. That’s where the lessons are learned and the opportunities appear. I write with humor, irreverence, and somehow any subject I talk about has a way of bringing the epic Lord of the Rings tale into it. And often donuts.

Decks: Pagan Otherworlds, Rider-Waite, The Edmund Dulac Tarot, The Starseed Oracle.

So! How do you survive this world? Here are my suggestions:

  • Leave it for a while. Don’t feel badly if you take time out of your hectic day to read some of your favorite book, listen to a podcast that you enjoy, have a quick convo with a friend who makes you laugh, end every night with your favorite show. It’s survival. (As I was writing this, I just had the unique pleasure of my not-so-cuddly cat wanting a cuddle, so I laid down with her for a while and didn’t feel one bit guilty about her taking time out of my day.)
  • Pamper yourself. Take luxurious baths, window shop, treat yourself to something amazing. You work hard. YES YOU, even if you aren’t even working any kind of ‘job’ at the moment. You are raising kids, you are volunteering, you are tending your living space, you are there for your friends and family, you are getting up each morning to face the world. Many of you are working a hectic job in a hectic world. You are surviving.
  • Find joy in the little things. Yes, many people suck, but the trees are green (for now!) and the wind sounds amazing as it whispers through them. The candle you light smells so good and brings a beautiful glow. The fresh fruit you eat not only tastes great but is good for you, and boy did you need that donut. A stranger smiled at you as they passed by. You smiled at the homeless person to let them know you see them. Doesn’t A/C feel good? Don’t you love your morning cup of coffee that brings you your satisfying morning poo? The list is endless, really.
  • Laughing and having fun. Never underestimate the power of pure entertainment in the form of film, books, podcasts, your favorite memes, etc. Those people that spend time and talent making you laugh and/or taking you away from this sucky world for a while have a very important role to get us all through the reality of it all.
  • Find your Fellowship. Yes, I hate that I’ve ‘unfollowed’ many people on the periphery of my life because of their toxic thoughts and feelings. Does that make me small-minded? Maybe it does, but it’s what I do to survive. My Fellowship cares for others, have open minds that believe both in science and the unknown, can be flawed and make mistakes, are creative in their own unique ways and embrace that, and can laugh at poop jokes. I’m always looking for more to add to my Fellowship, so if you’re still here after reading this, you’re in.
  • Do something outside your comfort zone. I talk about following your ‘Call of the Wild’–is there something that niggles at you to try and it gives you that scared-yet-excited feeling inside? That’s your wild side, calling to you that you need it to feed your soul. The time is now.
  • Do for others. Being helpful to others is a huge way of bringing joy to their lives, and our own. Give of yourself how you can…even just reaching out to check in on someone or smiling at a stranger can do wonders.
  • Come hang out with me! Sign up for my newsletter to keep up with my shenanigans, get a tarot reading for yourself (they are so fun and helpful!), stay tuned for my podcast which should be out within a few weeks! Podcasting is another way I coach; providing you with some inspirational tidbits, entertainment, fun and laughter! I’ve also been active on Clubhouse, with both an LOTR room and my Queens of Wands room that I do with my tarot BFF Halicue Hannah. Clubhouse is now open to all, so sign up, get on, and follow me–I will follow you right back! It’s a great audio-only app for you to market yourself and what you do, listen and learn, be entertained, and/or find your Fellowship!


Yes, that last one is an unabashed PLUG for me and my services, but hey. I told you that I tell it like it is, and I myself survive much better when I have my people by my side.

Have you gone there and back again with me, my friends? If so, let’s make some beautiful magic as we survive this crazy-ass world together, working like hell to someday, live our very best lives.

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